25 Things Moms hope don't happen for the Holidays

Hmm, have you ever watched a television show where everything was perfect? Especially those for Christmas and the holidays...especially commercials where you see all the holidays trimming all in neat packages. Every bow perfectly tied. The kids are sitting up smiling and behaving as if their right mind. Husband remembers to get the perfect Christmas gift and not appliance or tool which he wants. The mom is dizzy swirling around the kitchen cooking a perfect meal while wearing perfect make up, hair do and a wearing a big beautiful smile. She doesn't have flour in her hair from baking, the counter top is in immaculate condition and so is the entire kitchen. So you say, "Hmm, there's nothing real in that scene having to do with real women. That isn't the correct scene." So, I decided to write a this little book of humor of what real women are really thinking behind all the big smiles. What's really going on and not what's supposed to be or is ideal to be happening. Since we still can't openly say what we're thinking without serious repercussion. We've cheerfully left the era of Roseanne Connor and returned the June Cleaver. We sane women need a survival kit. Real women know that commercial is malarkey. That this isn't what happens in real life. On an average it takes apparently twenty hours to prepare a full course Christmas dinner no matter which meat you prepare! Especially with all the trimmings such as stuffing vegetables and other side dishes; don't forget the cakes, pies pastries, and cookies. And this is if you only plan to serve 6-8 people. This is not if you plan to serve 12 to 20 people which is not uncommon for a family gathering at Christmastime.