The Hotness

Collected here for the first time in one stunning volume are Lacey Noonan's first five novellas. So read what everyone is reading about and experience... THE HOTNESS. SUBMITTING TO THE LANDLORD "I'd be loath to call Kendall and Madison dumb, because you hate to lump people in categories like that, but spending some time categorizing their lumps was exactly what I wanted to do most." As owner of the building, sexy landlord Jeff Townsend is used to getting his way. But his tenants are driving him nuts. Kendall and Madison are two young, gorgeous newcomers to the city. They haunt his dreams-and the foyer to his building. Fed up with their constant flirtations that go nowhere, he invents a unique ruse to inspect their apartment one Sunday morning. HOT BOXED: HOW I FOUND LOVE ON AMAZON Randi works at an Amazon Distribution Center, putting packages together for customers. She assumes she will probably work there forever-it's like being trapped in a cardboard box. Then one day a name pops up on her scanner, a name that renews her with her old hopes and dreams, and suddenly everything changes. It's just a name, but now she is no longer content to lead an ordinary life. Her old dreams haunt her. Can she dare to fulfill them, to act, to escape her life? Learn what it takes to get the thing you most desire in this daring, sexy and funny story. THE BABYSITTER ONLY RINGS ONCE This is NOT your typical babysitter story... For years now, shy Sophie has babysat for the wealthy Lindstrom family. They are exceptionally good to her and she respects their high esteem in the affluent community they share. So one night when Sophie realizes she's left something scandalous at their house, she goes against all the fibers of her being and decides to get it back-no matter what, even if it means breaking into their mansion. Even if it means more scandal. What she recovers though is something she never knew existed-an education in the ways of the world, and insight into the lives of the Lindstroms. I DON'T CARE IF MY BEST FRIEND'S MOTHER IS A SASQUATCH, SHE'S HOT AND I'M TAKING A SHOWER WITH HER A chance meeting dredges up a long-forgotten mystery, and suddenly Jason is trapped on a roller coaster of mystery, danger and wildness. Now he is on the run with his star-crossed lover. Will they reach a shower in time, or will the natural heat that burns within her consume them both? Will his beautiful, bestial lover tear him to pieces with her giant claws in a lusty rage? Or will she tenderly lather him up, rinse and clean his naked, muscular and strong (for a human) body with scented soaps in a ritual of her people going back thousands of generations in a shower appropriately large enough to fit him and the mysterious, yet tender and svelte creature together? EAT FRESH: JAN, FLO & WENDY AND THE FIVE DOLLAR FOOT LONG "God damn, marketing events are bitch." And so begins the adventure of our three protagonists, Jan, Flo and Wendy-the three hottest stars of the contemporary TV commercial scene. Flo from Progressive, Jan from Toyota and Wendy from Wendy's are stuck at a boring PR event. They're being paid handsomely to sit by a pool in their skimpy bathing suits, sip cocktails and look pretty for the guests. The money is great, but Flo and Jan are bored to tears. Soon they are acting out and making shy, proper Wendy miserable. After a confrontation with Wendy's agent, the girls take it upstairs to Flo's hotel room. There they discover the pleasures of each other's bodies while playing a fun game with the TV-as well as the only Five Dollar Footlong that Jared from Subway bothered to bring to the event. Find out what happens in this sexy and funny story... And catch a peek behind the curtain of the business-side of Hollywood!