An Italian Journey: a Sort of Latter-day Mini Grand Tour

The formidable Iona, aka La-Belle-Dame-Sans-Merci, determined to instil some culture into her alcohol-appreciating and apparently sex-starved husband, accompanies him on a tour of the architectural and artistic highlights of Italy, like the Grand Tourists of yesteryear. Unlike those tourists though, who often spent as much as two years, if not longer, on the journey, La-Belle-Dame-Sans-Merci has only one week in which to transform her husband as they explore the delights of Naples, Pompeii, Assisi, Florence, Siena and Rome. And if that were not challenge enough, he displays an amazing propensity for opening his mouth and putting his foot in it, not to mention getting himself into a number of extremely embarrassing situations...